That would make it…2077?! WHAT?! Holy shit, and it’s on the copyright line and everything! Damn it, I need to read those things more often! Some kind of employee log…looks like they’ve all been time stamped. I wonder if they knew the “uncertain future” would be an alien invasion from dimension X. Guess those dudes must have built that vault I was in earlier. What the fuck? “Virgo II?” I thought that Three Dog guy was just talking out of his ass, but does this computer seriously expect me to believe something called “Virgo” landed on the moon? It was the Apollo mission! This is seriously creeping me out now. Wait a second, why is the information terminal old-tech? I understand all the new systems using the whole green and black system, but wouldn’t the Smithsonian Museum of fucking Technology upgrade at some point? Screw it, let’s see what it’s got. Any questions?)Īwesome, it’s still here! I was kind of figuring the aliens would have blown this whole area up like in Independence Day or something. Ouch, looks like someone took a bite out of the Capitol building. Black Mesa was a mess, but at least most of the areas were pretty big. (Please note: I just now skipped a sidequest.) What the hell? Where did that undershirt come from? Is there some sort of magic underpants gnome wandering around here? I’d better watch my back.įeel as free and happy as the day you’re born. I should probably stick with the lab coat. I thought the scrappy underdogs usually fought on my side. That’s weird, he doesn’t look like he was in the military. Oh, sweet, it saw something! Kick its ass, Robbie! Wasn’t he in Lost in Space too? Or was that a different robot? It’s like seeing one of my childhood fantasies powering up. Sweet, I loved Forbidden Planet! Lemmie just fire it up… …Robbie? Is this seriously Robbie the Robot in a can? Hell, this guy looks more like a mummy, really. They look more like…I dunno…regular zombies. Damn it, nothing’s made sense since I woke up in that vault!Īnd what the hell is wrong with all these headcrab zombies? They don’t have any headcrabs on them at all. Shouldn’t they have rebuilt this place after everything blew up? Hell, I haven’t seen a single Combine soldier or Xen dude or anything. I still can’t believe what’s happened to DC. Sweet, heading to the Washington Mall! Hey, I should stop by J street all my DC friends tell me there’s something awesome there. Today’s my birthday (for a little under an hour, at least), so let me get you all a present: a bonus update.
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